The pursuit of as much happiness in life as possible occupies every person in this world. And nowhere is so much written about and no more scientific research is done than what makes people happy. The profession of “happiness coach” arose from the need of people to experience more happiness in their lives. The fact that there are so many happiness coaches and there are even entire training courses for this indicates the need for this. But did you also know that you can control your own happiness for 50 percent yourself?
The most exciting thing about happiness (besides the pleasure of feeling happy) is that happiness takes your brain to the highest possible level, which means it drastically improves your problem solving skills, triples your creativity, increases your intelligence and improves your memory. Science also proves that when you increase your happiness levels, it affects the world around you and makes others happier!
In this article, 13 tips are given for the happiest possible life, which you can influence yourself!
Reduce materialism
We are tempted to run harder and harder on the hedonistic treadmill. We should break this pattern, because materialism does not increase happiness. Check for yourself what you are sensitive to, such as clothes, gadgets, and try to control your greed. It is difficult to completely withdraw from the modern consumer society, but try to choose something where the experience is more important than the purchase itself.
Insight into your consciousness
Try to your own Awareness to look as if you were watching a movie, you are, as it were, a spectator of your own thoughts. You can enjoy it in peace, but you also ensure that you can detach yourself when you think it is necessary. You can, as it were, choose to look at your thoughts with some distance and a good-natured smile and not let them take you hostage. If you can do this well, your luck will improve by leaps and bounds.
Reduce commuter traffic
Reducing the commute will increase happiness significantly. People consistently believe that having a cheaper and bigger house or a better paying job will make up for the longer commute to work. They are wrong.
What explains this 'commuter paradox'? Obviously, commuting is just plain unpleasant; it reduces time with your family, costs money and causes stress. And not only is it unpleasant for the commuter, it also diminishes the happiness of his family.
A man should make 40% more money with a job to compensate for a longer trip. But due to a weighing error, explained by psychologist Ap Dijksterhuis, people often still choose the bigger house over the smaller one and the chance to walk to work.
Consider two housing options: a three-bedroom apartment in the middle of a city, with a 10-minute journey time, or a five-bedroom villa on the outskirts of town, with a 45-minute journey time. “People will think about this consideration for a long time,” says Dijksterhuis. “And most will eventually opt for the big house. The pain of long commutes, meanwhile, will seem less and less important, at least when compared to the allure of an extra bathroom. But, as Dijksterhuis points out, the reasoning process is exactly the opposite: "The extra bathroom is a completely unnecessary asset for at least 362 or 363 days a year, while a long commute becomes a burden after a while."
Ap Dijksterhuis
Exercise: 15 minutes can be enough
Do you think exercise is something you don't have time for? Think again.
Exercise has such a profound effect on our happiness and well-being that it is an effective strategy for overcoming depression. In a study cited in Shawn Achor's book The Happiness Advantage, three groups of patients treated their depression with medication, exercise, or a combination of both. The results of this study are surprising: Although all three groups experienced similar improvements in their happiness levels early on, the follow-up ratings turned out to be radically different:
The groups were then tested six months later to assess their relapse rate. Of those who took the medication alone, 38 percent had gone back to depression. Those in the combination group fared only slightly better, with a 31 percent relapse rate. The biggest shock, however, came from the exercise group: their relapse rate was only 9 percent.
However, you don't have to be depressed to benefit from exercise. Exercise can help you relax, increase your brain power and even improve your body image, even if you are not losing weight.
Helping others increases your own happiness
Try to help others and make them happier. You can do this by providing development aid in a third world country and that is very noble. But you could also change your attitude by teaching yourself to always keep the question in the back of your mind when meeting others whether you can do something for this person. We underestimate the effect of a simple compliment, but this can make someone else's day! Or send a short text or email to someone to thank them for the role they play in your life.
Connection with others
Almost any kind of social contact makes you happier. Try making more contact with others, in shops, on the street, even if it is just a trivial chat.
Do things that make you feel like you are part of something big, such as festivals or concerts, on a regular basis, where you feel a connection with others. They have a great effect on happiness.
Satisfying leisure activity
See if you can exchange part of your passive and careless leisure time for active and serious leisure time. You can start charting your current leisure activities, for example by keeping a diary. You can then exchange part of your aimless time use for more visits to your friends or to follow a course. It will increase your happiness!
With the money you don't need, buy experiences instead of stuff. Go to that concert with friends or go out for dinner. Try to learn new things and pack your bags for a long journey if possible!
Gratitude increases happiness
Every night, try to name at least three new things that you are grateful for and why you are grateful for this. They may also be things that you think you have done well or that you think you have done well to do them. They may also be small, apparently insignificant things. It works best if you write them down. In America they call this the WWW technique; What went well? In other words, what went well today?
There are many ways to practice gratitude, from keeping a journal of things you are grateful for, sharing three good things that happen every day with a friend or your partner, and doing your best to show gratitude when others help you.
Avoiding negative emotions
Investigate your negative emotions by keeping and charting them in a diary. Then see if you can avoid them by changing your behavior. You can also see your negative emotions as clouds that eventually pass away.
Journaling
Journaling in Dutch is nothing more than keeping a diary. What do you want to remind yourself of the most significant experience you had in the past 24 hours?
Right goals
For greater happiness, it is important that you set the right goals and that you investigate whether they are satisfying and lead to positive emotions. In this way determine which of your goals are intrinsic and which are external goals. Don't be afraid to part with imposed or external goals. It will increase your happiness. Goals are less about how you feel when you have achieved them than about how you feel while pursuing them.
Focus on one thing at a time
Organize your life as much as possible so that you only do one thing at a time. This applies to everything in life, from managing your email traffic to checking your WhatsApp messages. Don't check your email too often, and when you read your email, make sure it doesn't keep brewing in the back of your mind and disturb your peace of mind, and thus happiness. You do this by choosing one of the three following actions for each message;
- Replies to the message immediately
- Discard the message
- Determine exactly when to reply to the message
Training of consciousness
For better luck it is important to be mindful as much as possible. Focus your awareness on the here and now. You can practice this by concentrating more through mini-fullness exercises. Many people benefit from an organized meditation course, for example.
Sources including On to happiness (link); The happiness advantage (link)
