Are you grumpy, irritated or very irritable?
Irritability is something we all experience at one time or another, but what sets it apart from other emotional states is the extent to which it completely pollutes the emotional atmosphere around us.
Irritability is indeed the carbon monoxide of emotional pollutants. One person's irritable mood can release negativity and stress-causing vibes that negatively affect the entire family, office, or environment.
When we feel irritable, we feel tense, cranky, irritable, and sour. Our tolerance is lower and we are much more likely to suffer from the kind of minor frustrations we usually shake off. Our reactions to irritants are also likely to be much more aggressive than usual, causing us to annoy, bark, and punish those around us.
For example, if the supervisor in the office is annoyed, the word quickly spreads around the office to keep him or her away from you. If the mother or father in the family comes home from work annoyed, it takes a few minutes for the children to exchange knowing glances and quietly retreat to their rooms (or disappear into their cell phone or gaming session).
Irritability is also no party for the person experiencing it. Our stress hormones kick in and we get into the same fight-or-flight mentality our ancestors did when they kept watch at the cave entrance to signal impending danger. The slightest movement or sound can make us jump and react as if we are being attacked, with no threat in sight.
Most people would love to snap their fingers and get rid of this toxic emotional state if they could. Now it won't be as easy as snapping your fingers, but here are 7 important things you can do to calm yourself and become more balanced when you're feeling irritable or tense.
Look for the cause
The best way to reduce irritability is to find out what makes you irritable — and then address it. Identify when you first became annoyed and think about what may have misled you. It's important to remember that while your reactions may feel very complex right now, the problem that caused them may be simple and obvious.
It's often the little things
We often ignore things that shouldn't make us annoyed, even if they do. A competitive person can get annoyed by losing a game of cards. But because everyone knows it's actually stupid to get annoyed about it, people ignore it when it actually caused their internal sourness. Be honest with yourself about what's bothering you: simply acknowledging that something makes you irritable is often enough to take the edge off.
Reduce caffeine and alcohol
Too much caffeine during the day and too much alcohol at night are frequent sources of irritability for many people. So consider reducing this considerably.
Take a deep breath
Thoughts like, “I can't stand being here another minute,” will fuel your irritability. Your body will respond accordingly by releasing cortisol, a stress hormone.
Then your heart might beat faster. Your palms may get sweaty. Your blood pressure may rise.
Taking a few slow, deep breaths can calm your physiological response. When your body calms down, your brain can also calm down.
If you're feeling stressed and irritable, try breathing in through your nose slowly for a count of three. Hold your breath for just one second, then exhale slowly through pursed lips for a count of three. Do that three times and see if you feel any better.
Seek your compassion again
Being compassionate – with yourself – can be a powerful way to calm your swirling emotions. Acknowledge (in your head) that you feel really irritable – and how unpleasant it is. Then imagine getting a hug from someone who cares about you. Once you feel a little better, use your compassion to think about how the people around you are feeling and how important it is not to take it out on them.
Getting perspective
We usually feel annoyed about minor to medium annoyances — the kind of annoyances that we probably won't remember in a few days or weeks. Take a few minutes to remind yourself of the bigger picture—the things that are going well in your life and the things you can be thankful for, such as health and opportunities. But if you still feel too restless to think like that or things like this, try the following…
Free yourself from nervous energy
Since irritability activates our fight-or-flight response sets, it might be a good idea to take some time to burn off your energy by going for a walk or run, or doing some quick push-ups or crunches to get rid of excess energy that fuels your irritability. . Fresh air during a leisurely walk can also do wonders. For those who don't feel like expending their energy this way, the completely opposite approach also works.
help someone else
Helping someone is good for several reasons.
First of all, it helps you get out of your head and distracts you from what's causing you to be cranky. Taking time and doing something completely different helps your ability to process your moodiness because you give time and allow your subconscious to work in – and your subconsciousness is MUCH more powerful than your conscious brain.
Helping someone also helps YOU in another way – it makes you happy.
Quiet time
Find a quiet place to think about things, or to disconnect from the commotion and activity around you. Irritability can be your mind's way of alerting you that you need a break, so take one. Listen to some relaxing music, do some stretching or yoga, meditate or take a bubble bath.
When you're done, take a deep breath and prepare to get back to work slowly so that your system doesn't get irritated again the moment you experience busyness again and end up in the same battle.
Sources ao AlisonsNotebook (link), PsychologyToday (link), VeryWellMind (link)
